Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Don't get me wrong...I'm very positive about my treatment and the outcome of it, but I'm not going to lie...this sucks. Chemo sucks. I miss myself. Energetic, silly, slightly annoying to normal adults. And I've only had one treatment so far. Now I have to go back and let them do this to me again and again. I want to play and have fun with my kids. To not be so worried about which medicine I need next so I don't throw up on everyone. I sound pretty whiny right now, but I want this blog to be real. What I really feel. Even if it is whiny sometimes. It's too much pressure to be positive, happy and patient all of the time. Under that pressure I would break. So if you're reading my posts and ever get tired of the whiny or angry ones, just skip them. They are more for me. A kind of therapy. I am hoping that being able purge the feelings from my soul will help me function better in my life. To get used to my new "normal". The new me....for a while. I so look forward to having my life back. I took it for granted before.